and im back...

back in the U.S.

back in the "long-distance" part of the relationship.

back at home.

back on my own during the day.

back feeling like my other half is just missing.

back to driving on the "right" side of the street.

back to chain restaurants and cheap drinks.

back to familiar scenes and sounds.

back to my dogs.

back to my family.

back to my friends.

I had the best trip of my life while in Australia. Let me put it this way, if you could live and feel the euphoria you would feel in a really good dream then that's how I lived for the past five weeks. Life felt so surreal and I finally felt that hole in my head filled because I was around the one I love the most. The food tasted better, the hours went by sweeter, and time was kind. The trip went by hastily but at the same time it went just fast enough for me to feel happy and feel like I was making up for all the days I spent miserable. I love Des so much and he's right in everything he consoles me with. I love our relationship, I love the life that he opens up for me, and I'm grateful, so so grateful, to God for being blessed with this relationship and for Des.

I'll finish my blog about Aus for sure even if it's going to take some time. I'm really sad right now because I miss the life I had while I was there and I miss the company of my other half, but it'll be ok. Another few months until I get another hug and I know we can make it. Past this point, we'll have spent more time apart than together but that's ok. Because we make up for it in essence.

Happy 11 month anniversary darling, it sucks that that had to be the day I left, but it's ok. I love you.


Sigh...and now to forage around for some food...not that i actually want to eat anything here...i only want to eat what baby had to feed me...he picked the food and where we ate...i hate having to decide for myself all the time, half the fun of a relationship is getting someone else's opinions and choices...

for all who are in a relationship with normal distances between partners, don't take it for granted, and don't think that you have it easier than me.

with love,

bam